Hello Everyone,
Our seasons are changing here in Preston County and as a result the leaves are falling and you can smell Fall in the air. Thinking about the cycle of the seasons, the way the plants die off and then are reborn in the Spring...the way everything looks so hopeless in the Winter...and yet, really it's not all made me think about relationships, specifically marriages.
In the past couple of years my husband and I have been through so much, me from a medical and legal standpoint and he has supported me through everything. When I looked hopeless - he saw hope. No matter what I did to ensure that I wouldn't see another season he never gave up. He believes (unlike many) that marriage is for better or worse...bottom line..better or worse. He's a fighter and he taught me to fight and helped me to regain my strength, my dignity, my soul.
I've been given the miraculous opportunity to regroup and work on being healthy - I'm so thankful for that. Much like the world regroups one season to another.
So..this struggle is a season, a time to heal, to regroup and to know that the next season will bring change. Bring it on, I'm ready.
Blessings to everyone!!!!
Shawn
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Faith
It's hard to believe it's been so many weeks since my last post...time has a way of slipping past us, un-noticed.
Much has happened since I posted last...probably the most significant is that Judge Miller removed himself from my case. As a result, I will be appointed a new Judge by the Supreme Court Justices. I haven't received word yet as to who the new Judge will be, but I'm anxiously awaiting that news.
I also have change psychiatrists - my new doc is Dr. Kavara Vaughn at Chestnut Ridge. I have met with her once thus far and really liked her and her staff. She will not be leaving Chestnut Ridge for approximately two years...which was one of my requirements. I'm not fond of switching docs - takes far too long to find one you trust that is willing to really get to know you. And usually new docs want to change your meds - she does want to add a mood stabilizer to what I'm already taking which sounds like a good idea to me, so I'm open to trying!
I've been thinking so much lately about what my future holds...I know God has a plan for me, and with that in mind I'm finding myself more comfortable and less worried. My last ECT treatment was last Wednesday and I seemed to recover pretty quickly, which makes having them a lot more tolerable!!
I've started exercising pretty regularly - each day doing cardio and weights. That has had a tremendous impact on my stamina and mood. I'm finding it could be key in the success of all other treatment and don't think the doctors put enough emphasis on the psychological benefits of exercise. Exercise creates the good chemicals that work between the pathways in the brain. The more good chemicals that are present the better for people with any mental illness. I'm also attempting (emphasis on "attempting") to change my diet and those with whom I chose to surround myself. Processed sugars are not good for Bipolar Disorder, additives, chemicals etc. Those things seems to have more of a "mood" impact on Bipolar suffers than you might think.
We found out last week that one of my meds that was previously on the PEIA "preferred" drug list is now no longer on that list which results in a much, much higher payment for me. I'm going to be calling our insurance company to see if I can get that changed. I've also been looking into 90 day bipolar rehab programs in the Eastern US, which we're hoping might be an alternative in sentencing if need be...They actually sound very good and seem that they could be very beneficial, I'll have to check into the insurance for that as well.
I'm very happy to let everyone know that we have been spending a great deal more time with Charlie's kids and their families. I seem to be getting especially close to Chase, our grandson, which makes my heart so happy!!! My only concern is that if I do have to "go away" for any length of time...I'm afraid that not only will I have to start over medically, but also I'm scared of losing ground that's been gained with Charlie's kids...it would break my heart...of that, I am certain.
My time with Charlie has been wonderful...as usual. So many people seem surprised by the amount of time we like to spend together...it seems so normal to us. He is truly my best friend and knows me better than anyone...loving him is like breathing...I don't even think about it, I do it and if it were taken away I truly believe I would just die without the "breath" of his love for me. Of that I am also certain.
We are planning a vacation which will begin in the next couple of weeks, I'm really looking forward to getting away from all that distracts us here at home and at work...
Wishing you all a wonderful couple of weeks - I will check back in soon!!
Much has happened since I posted last...probably the most significant is that Judge Miller removed himself from my case. As a result, I will be appointed a new Judge by the Supreme Court Justices. I haven't received word yet as to who the new Judge will be, but I'm anxiously awaiting that news.
I also have change psychiatrists - my new doc is Dr. Kavara Vaughn at Chestnut Ridge. I have met with her once thus far and really liked her and her staff. She will not be leaving Chestnut Ridge for approximately two years...which was one of my requirements. I'm not fond of switching docs - takes far too long to find one you trust that is willing to really get to know you. And usually new docs want to change your meds - she does want to add a mood stabilizer to what I'm already taking which sounds like a good idea to me, so I'm open to trying!
I've been thinking so much lately about what my future holds...I know God has a plan for me, and with that in mind I'm finding myself more comfortable and less worried. My last ECT treatment was last Wednesday and I seemed to recover pretty quickly, which makes having them a lot more tolerable!!
I've started exercising pretty regularly - each day doing cardio and weights. That has had a tremendous impact on my stamina and mood. I'm finding it could be key in the success of all other treatment and don't think the doctors put enough emphasis on the psychological benefits of exercise. Exercise creates the good chemicals that work between the pathways in the brain. The more good chemicals that are present the better for people with any mental illness. I'm also attempting (emphasis on "attempting") to change my diet and those with whom I chose to surround myself. Processed sugars are not good for Bipolar Disorder, additives, chemicals etc. Those things seems to have more of a "mood" impact on Bipolar suffers than you might think.
We found out last week that one of my meds that was previously on the PEIA "preferred" drug list is now no longer on that list which results in a much, much higher payment for me. I'm going to be calling our insurance company to see if I can get that changed. I've also been looking into 90 day bipolar rehab programs in the Eastern US, which we're hoping might be an alternative in sentencing if need be...They actually sound very good and seem that they could be very beneficial, I'll have to check into the insurance for that as well.
I'm very happy to let everyone know that we have been spending a great deal more time with Charlie's kids and their families. I seem to be getting especially close to Chase, our grandson, which makes my heart so happy!!! My only concern is that if I do have to "go away" for any length of time...I'm afraid that not only will I have to start over medically, but also I'm scared of losing ground that's been gained with Charlie's kids...it would break my heart...of that, I am certain.
My time with Charlie has been wonderful...as usual. So many people seem surprised by the amount of time we like to spend together...it seems so normal to us. He is truly my best friend and knows me better than anyone...loving him is like breathing...I don't even think about it, I do it and if it were taken away I truly believe I would just die without the "breath" of his love for me. Of that I am also certain.
We are planning a vacation which will begin in the next couple of weeks, I'm really looking forward to getting away from all that distracts us here at home and at work...
Wishing you all a wonderful couple of weeks - I will check back in soon!!
Monday, June 14, 2010
Ending The Stigma!
Mental illness is one of the most unrecognized and unreported health problems in the United States. Although it is one of the most pervasive and disabling illnesses, it is not viewed as a real illness, such as cancer, heart disease, or diabetes. As a result stigma becomes one of the major barriers to accessing mental health services. Stigma also causes discrimination in many other aspects of a person’s life, including the work place, academia, the local community, and even relationships with family and friends, whose support is so crucial to recovery. For many, the stigma is worse than the illness itself!
The most devastating result of all is when stigma has a damaging effect on a person’s recovery and the ability and will needed to find appropriate treatment, access to critical services, and support from health care providers and insurers. The Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance (DBSA) believes governments and others must take the following steps to help end the stigma and discrimination surrounding mental illnesses:
Federal officials should provide leadership and resources to decrease the stigma against mental illness that prevents people from acknowledging their illness and seeking treatment.
Federal, state, and local governments must provide needed resources for ongoing, public awareness programs to communicate that mental illnesses are real, medical, and treatable illnesses.
Governments, media, consumers, and advocacy organizations must educate the public that mental heath is integral to overall health and that with appropriate treatment, consumers can recover and live full and productive lives.
Federal and state governments must provide funding for additional and improved community based mental health services for families facing the devastating decision of custody relinquishment of a seriously-ill child in order to receive necessary treatment.
Federal and state governments must provide the means for local advocacy organizations to work with law enforcement and criminal justice systems to meet the need for better assessment, counseling services, and training that prevent incarceration and post recidivism of persons living with a mental illness.
Mental health consumers must always be included in the development, implementation, and evaluation of all federal, state, community-based, and private sector programs to ensure accuracy and efficacy in addressing mental illness.
DBSA believes congressional committees and relevant federal government agencies must take a proactive role in funding and working with peer-based, mental health advocacy organizations to alleviate the stigma surrounding mental illness. Elected officials on the federal, state, and local levels — who have lived with mental illness personally or through the lives of their families — should be encouraged to share their experiences with the public. Such outreach should be aimed at educating and informing the general public that mental illnesses are no different than physical illnesses and can be treated effectively, with recovery an ultimate and achievable goal
The most devastating result of all is when stigma has a damaging effect on a person’s recovery and the ability and will needed to find appropriate treatment, access to critical services, and support from health care providers and insurers. The Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance (DBSA) believes governments and others must take the following steps to help end the stigma and discrimination surrounding mental illnesses:
Federal officials should provide leadership and resources to decrease the stigma against mental illness that prevents people from acknowledging their illness and seeking treatment.
Federal, state, and local governments must provide needed resources for ongoing, public awareness programs to communicate that mental illnesses are real, medical, and treatable illnesses.
Governments, media, consumers, and advocacy organizations must educate the public that mental heath is integral to overall health and that with appropriate treatment, consumers can recover and live full and productive lives.
Federal and state governments must provide funding for additional and improved community based mental health services for families facing the devastating decision of custody relinquishment of a seriously-ill child in order to receive necessary treatment.
Federal and state governments must provide the means for local advocacy organizations to work with law enforcement and criminal justice systems to meet the need for better assessment, counseling services, and training that prevent incarceration and post recidivism of persons living with a mental illness.
Mental health consumers must always be included in the development, implementation, and evaluation of all federal, state, community-based, and private sector programs to ensure accuracy and efficacy in addressing mental illness.
DBSA believes congressional committees and relevant federal government agencies must take a proactive role in funding and working with peer-based, mental health advocacy organizations to alleviate the stigma surrounding mental illness. Elected officials on the federal, state, and local levels — who have lived with mental illness personally or through the lives of their families — should be encouraged to share their experiences with the public. Such outreach should be aimed at educating and informing the general public that mental illnesses are no different than physical illnesses and can be treated effectively, with recovery an ultimate and achievable goal
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Essay Questions for Peer Support Specialist Application
Hello Everyone!
The Depression Bipolar Support Alliance is offering a "Peer Support Specialist" class in Lombard Illinois this summer. In order to get into the selection process I had to fill out an application that included several essay-type questions. I thought I would post the questions and answers, they offer some further insite into my history, my treatment and my hopes....
2010 DBSA PEER SPECIALIST TRAINING APPLICATION
1. A) Why do you want to become a peer specialist?
I would like to become a peer specialist in order to become better equipped in conducting my DBSA support groups in Kingwood, WV and Morgantown, WV. I also feel that becoming a peer specialist would offer me more insight in assisting others with their mental health needs, helping me provide valuable tools that could aid in their recovery, and provide me with critical information when dealing with the person(s) suffering as well as their friends and family.
B) What makes you a good candidate to work with other consumers in the mental health field?
I am 45 years old and for the bulk of my life I have suffered and struggled with mental illness. I have been misdiagnosed, taken many medications that did and didn’t work and struggled through their various side effects, I have personally seen how Bipolar and Depression can affect not only the patient but also their relationships with their spouse, family, children, their work life and social life. I have been hospitalized a total of 6 times in mental health hospitals, some private and some state-run. About 2 years ago I had the worst bipolar episode I have ever had which resulted in a suicide attempt, hospitalization, intense group therapy, individual psychotherapy, and, ultimately, I agreed to try Electro Convulsive Therapy, which has worked incredibly well for my particular situation. I’ve also had a great deal of experience with dealing with the inner workings of medical insurance with regard to mental health coverage, and have successfully gotten that coverage expanded for my own mental healthcare needs. I believe this background does make me a good candidate to work with other consumers in the mental health field, as, in my opinion, there is no better experience than personal experience. That personal experience also helps the consumer relate to, and trust the provider. I know first-hand you cannot “snap out of mental health issues” or “shake off mental illness”…it takes work, support and persistence to make strides towards recovery.
2. A) What does recovery mean to you?
To me, recovery means understanding your mental illness and the treatment options that are currently available, realizing you have to power to control and minimize some, if not all, of the symptoms, maintaining your medical and mental health treatment, and working closely and honestly with your providers and those that are supportive. It also means working towards getting past the stigma of being diagnosed with a mental illness, “owning” it and learning to work with it, not against it. Recovery also means finding and utilizing different support mechanisms. To me, that is a critical part of recovery, as that will help maintain the recovery. Hopefully, recovery would eventually mean accepting your illness and understanding that while care is necessary, it doesn’t “define” the person who has been diagnosed. Bipolar and depression are manageable; knowing and understanding that is a large part of the recovery process.
B) What were/are important factors in your own recovery?
There are many factors that are so important in my own recovery. My family’s support and understanding, their willingness to attend doctor’s appointments and therapy with me; my husband’s unwavering support; not giving up on finding the proper treatment that works specifically for me and my needs and body; finding a psychiatrist and psychotherapist that work for me and my personality – doctors that I’m comfortable with and whom I trust implicitly. Taking my medications on time, keeping my ECT appointments which are currently once per months, being honest about how I’m feeling with my doctors and family, keeping stressors to a minimum, as I know they are triggers for my bipolar disorder, and conducting my own DBSA support groups has also been extremely instrumental in my recovery. Having been through so much, it’s very helpful to me to use that information to help others.
C) What types of experiences have you had in assisting, or advocating for, consumers of mental health services (for example, support group leadership, self-advocacy, public testimony, programs you started, etc.)? Please be specific.
While hospitalized I interacted closely with several patients in my group settings; I have spoken out publically on as many occasions as possible – never shying away from talking about my own personal experience and trying to reduce the stigma afflicting those suffering with mental illness; I have started two support groups through the DBSA which are going very well, one is in a smaller town, Kingwood WV, and the other is in a more metropolitan area, Morgantown, WV. I hope to begin speaking at high schools next year about mental health awareness in an effort to reduce the stigma and begin tackling how mental illness is perceived at an earlier age so it doesn’t manifest itself as the children grow into adulthood. There is power in knowledge in my opinion. I have given public testimony in my church and at my supports groups. I’m also considering working towards taking one of my dogs to therapy school in the hopes of visiting the local mental health facilities in this area. I remember working with a therapy dog at Chestnut Ridge in Morgantown WV, and it was incredible…dogs don’t judge, or care if you’re bipolar or depressed, they just love unconditionally.
3. A) Do you currently hold a position where you will use the skills gained through Peer Specialist training and certification? I am currently a member of the Red Cross and have started two DBSA support groups. I would hope to use the skills gained to assist those in my groups as well as aid in helping those going through disasters and/or the emergency/aid personnel assisting with disaster relief. I do not receive pay for these positions.
B) Are you a current candidate for a position where you will use the skills gained through Peer Specialist training and certification? No, I am not currently a candidate for a position where I would use the skills gained through Peer Specialist training and certification.
See attached Application.
Thank you,
Shawn Rhenae Graham
The Depression Bipolar Support Alliance is offering a "Peer Support Specialist" class in Lombard Illinois this summer. In order to get into the selection process I had to fill out an application that included several essay-type questions. I thought I would post the questions and answers, they offer some further insite into my history, my treatment and my hopes....
2010 DBSA PEER SPECIALIST TRAINING APPLICATION
1. A) Why do you want to become a peer specialist?
I would like to become a peer specialist in order to become better equipped in conducting my DBSA support groups in Kingwood, WV and Morgantown, WV. I also feel that becoming a peer specialist would offer me more insight in assisting others with their mental health needs, helping me provide valuable tools that could aid in their recovery, and provide me with critical information when dealing with the person(s) suffering as well as their friends and family.
B) What makes you a good candidate to work with other consumers in the mental health field?
I am 45 years old and for the bulk of my life I have suffered and struggled with mental illness. I have been misdiagnosed, taken many medications that did and didn’t work and struggled through their various side effects, I have personally seen how Bipolar and Depression can affect not only the patient but also their relationships with their spouse, family, children, their work life and social life. I have been hospitalized a total of 6 times in mental health hospitals, some private and some state-run. About 2 years ago I had the worst bipolar episode I have ever had which resulted in a suicide attempt, hospitalization, intense group therapy, individual psychotherapy, and, ultimately, I agreed to try Electro Convulsive Therapy, which has worked incredibly well for my particular situation. I’ve also had a great deal of experience with dealing with the inner workings of medical insurance with regard to mental health coverage, and have successfully gotten that coverage expanded for my own mental healthcare needs. I believe this background does make me a good candidate to work with other consumers in the mental health field, as, in my opinion, there is no better experience than personal experience. That personal experience also helps the consumer relate to, and trust the provider. I know first-hand you cannot “snap out of mental health issues” or “shake off mental illness”…it takes work, support and persistence to make strides towards recovery.
2. A) What does recovery mean to you?
To me, recovery means understanding your mental illness and the treatment options that are currently available, realizing you have to power to control and minimize some, if not all, of the symptoms, maintaining your medical and mental health treatment, and working closely and honestly with your providers and those that are supportive. It also means working towards getting past the stigma of being diagnosed with a mental illness, “owning” it and learning to work with it, not against it. Recovery also means finding and utilizing different support mechanisms. To me, that is a critical part of recovery, as that will help maintain the recovery. Hopefully, recovery would eventually mean accepting your illness and understanding that while care is necessary, it doesn’t “define” the person who has been diagnosed. Bipolar and depression are manageable; knowing and understanding that is a large part of the recovery process.
B) What were/are important factors in your own recovery?
There are many factors that are so important in my own recovery. My family’s support and understanding, their willingness to attend doctor’s appointments and therapy with me; my husband’s unwavering support; not giving up on finding the proper treatment that works specifically for me and my needs and body; finding a psychiatrist and psychotherapist that work for me and my personality – doctors that I’m comfortable with and whom I trust implicitly. Taking my medications on time, keeping my ECT appointments which are currently once per months, being honest about how I’m feeling with my doctors and family, keeping stressors to a minimum, as I know they are triggers for my bipolar disorder, and conducting my own DBSA support groups has also been extremely instrumental in my recovery. Having been through so much, it’s very helpful to me to use that information to help others.
C) What types of experiences have you had in assisting, or advocating for, consumers of mental health services (for example, support group leadership, self-advocacy, public testimony, programs you started, etc.)? Please be specific.
While hospitalized I interacted closely with several patients in my group settings; I have spoken out publically on as many occasions as possible – never shying away from talking about my own personal experience and trying to reduce the stigma afflicting those suffering with mental illness; I have started two support groups through the DBSA which are going very well, one is in a smaller town, Kingwood WV, and the other is in a more metropolitan area, Morgantown, WV. I hope to begin speaking at high schools next year about mental health awareness in an effort to reduce the stigma and begin tackling how mental illness is perceived at an earlier age so it doesn’t manifest itself as the children grow into adulthood. There is power in knowledge in my opinion. I have given public testimony in my church and at my supports groups. I’m also considering working towards taking one of my dogs to therapy school in the hopes of visiting the local mental health facilities in this area. I remember working with a therapy dog at Chestnut Ridge in Morgantown WV, and it was incredible…dogs don’t judge, or care if you’re bipolar or depressed, they just love unconditionally.
3. A) Do you currently hold a position where you will use the skills gained through Peer Specialist training and certification? I am currently a member of the Red Cross and have started two DBSA support groups. I would hope to use the skills gained to assist those in my groups as well as aid in helping those going through disasters and/or the emergency/aid personnel assisting with disaster relief. I do not receive pay for these positions.
B) Are you a current candidate for a position where you will use the skills gained through Peer Specialist training and certification? No, I am not currently a candidate for a position where I would use the skills gained through Peer Specialist training and certification.
See attached Application.
Thank you,
Shawn Rhenae Graham
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Testimony
Hi Everyone,
Today Charlie and I joined our church here in Kingwood and as part of that ceremony we were offered the opportunity to give a testimony about what lead us to God, lead us astray, miracles we have witnessed...
I'm not really one to speak about personal things in front of a large crowd of people who are mostly unfamiliar to me, as we attend the smaller, 8:30am service, but I was truly lead to speak and as it turned out it really opened to "gates" and got the ball rolling so to speak. I never realized how important testimony is - not only on a church level but also a personal level until today, and it was truly amazing! Following is my testimony that I gave in church today....
"As some of you may know, the past year and half have been very difficult for my husband, for my family and for me on many different levels, but through these difficulties I have found mercy, grace, forgiveness and God’s healing power in so many places...
In the beginning I ignored, and lost sight of what God was trying to do through me, much like someone climbing a mountain…you can focus on how far you have left to go, how each step can be precarious, or you can look up and realize you are one step closer to the summit and while you might stumble, or tire, God’s grace and forgiveness awaits you. It always has…
The first time I mustered up the courage to come into our church, with my head hung rather low I started to take a seat in the back pew…that’s when a very wise man, who happens to be my husband, looked at me and knowing I typically like to sit in the front..said “why are you sitting in the back?” …I said, well, I’m a sinner and I would imagine sinners would sit in the back. He looked at me and said - everyone in here is a sinner, that’s why we have God, and with that we moved to the front.
I would like to thank all of you for making me feel so welcome and I’d like to say thank you to Pastor Jenny and my husband for tirelessly answering all of my theological questions and to my Mother and sister for all they have done to not only help me heal on a physical and emotional and mental level, but also for their help in leading me up the mountain.
It always seemed my heart had a vacant spot in it…now I know why and it feels so good to have a heart occupied by God."
Today Charlie and I joined our church here in Kingwood and as part of that ceremony we were offered the opportunity to give a testimony about what lead us to God, lead us astray, miracles we have witnessed...
I'm not really one to speak about personal things in front of a large crowd of people who are mostly unfamiliar to me, as we attend the smaller, 8:30am service, but I was truly lead to speak and as it turned out it really opened to "gates" and got the ball rolling so to speak. I never realized how important testimony is - not only on a church level but also a personal level until today, and it was truly amazing! Following is my testimony that I gave in church today....
"As some of you may know, the past year and half have been very difficult for my husband, for my family and for me on many different levels, but through these difficulties I have found mercy, grace, forgiveness and God’s healing power in so many places...
In the beginning I ignored, and lost sight of what God was trying to do through me, much like someone climbing a mountain…you can focus on how far you have left to go, how each step can be precarious, or you can look up and realize you are one step closer to the summit and while you might stumble, or tire, God’s grace and forgiveness awaits you. It always has…
The first time I mustered up the courage to come into our church, with my head hung rather low I started to take a seat in the back pew…that’s when a very wise man, who happens to be my husband, looked at me and knowing I typically like to sit in the front..said “why are you sitting in the back?” …I said, well, I’m a sinner and I would imagine sinners would sit in the back. He looked at me and said - everyone in here is a sinner, that’s why we have God, and with that we moved to the front.
I would like to thank all of you for making me feel so welcome and I’d like to say thank you to Pastor Jenny and my husband for tirelessly answering all of my theological questions and to my Mother and sister for all they have done to not only help me heal on a physical and emotional and mental level, but also for their help in leading me up the mountain.
It always seemed my heart had a vacant spot in it…now I know why and it feels so good to have a heart occupied by God."
Sunday, May 16, 2010
Gaining Strength
Hi Everyone!
Thought I would take a moment to share an update...
The ECT treatments are still on-going, about one every 4 weeks. I would love to say that I don't think I need them anymore, but honestly I know that I do and I know they help tremendously. I can feel the difference, which is hard to describe - but it's as if the storm in my mind calms. It clearly works for me, and for that I am so thankful.
Continuing psychotherapy once a week with Dr. Allen, there is a great comfort level with him which makes talking and healing that much easier...psychotherapy is a lot of work which I enjoy. It's nice to feel as though I'm actively participating in my own recovery.
Probably the most exciting news is that we (Charlie and I) had our first Depressions Bipolar Support Alliance meeting. We started a chapter in Preston County that meets at the Wesley United Methodist Church the 1st and 3rd Tuesday of each month. We are now starting a Morgantown chapter which will meet on the 2nd and 4th Tuesday of the month. We both brought a lot to the meeting - of course from different perspectives and it went very well.
I feel like things are coming full circle - the hurt, the pain - all the suffering for so many years is coming full circle and helping others - God works in wondrous ways!
I still don't know the path I will be given the next few months, however, I do know that regardless of the path, it will lead to the same place and I will have continue to try to help others deal with mental health issues..and to raise awareness!
God Bless,
Shawn
Thought I would take a moment to share an update...
The ECT treatments are still on-going, about one every 4 weeks. I would love to say that I don't think I need them anymore, but honestly I know that I do and I know they help tremendously. I can feel the difference, which is hard to describe - but it's as if the storm in my mind calms. It clearly works for me, and for that I am so thankful.
Continuing psychotherapy once a week with Dr. Allen, there is a great comfort level with him which makes talking and healing that much easier...psychotherapy is a lot of work which I enjoy. It's nice to feel as though I'm actively participating in my own recovery.
Probably the most exciting news is that we (Charlie and I) had our first Depressions Bipolar Support Alliance meeting. We started a chapter in Preston County that meets at the Wesley United Methodist Church the 1st and 3rd Tuesday of each month. We are now starting a Morgantown chapter which will meet on the 2nd and 4th Tuesday of the month. We both brought a lot to the meeting - of course from different perspectives and it went very well.
I feel like things are coming full circle - the hurt, the pain - all the suffering for so many years is coming full circle and helping others - God works in wondrous ways!
I still don't know the path I will be given the next few months, however, I do know that regardless of the path, it will lead to the same place and I will have continue to try to help others deal with mental health issues..and to raise awareness!
God Bless,
Shawn
Monday, March 29, 2010
Good News!
As promised...a follow-up after meeting my new Psychologist for the first time!
I'm thrilled to let everyone know that I really like my new doctor and felt that all important "click" right away. It was as if it was meant to be...easy to talk to, but at the same time it really seemed like he truly cared and he gave me great feedback and we actually have a plan! I've never really participated in intense psychotherapy (talk therapy) before, and I'm looking forward to it...although it's also somewhat scary, I'm certain it won't be easy and I know I will have A LOT of work to do between appointments.
One of the most ironic things is that he is located at the Morgantown Pastoral Psychological Center..so, I really didn't know what his approach would be and I was quite hesitant and nervous. But, I put my faith in the Lord and wow, I was so amazed...with the doctor of course, but more importantly with how God provided him to me. It was through some pretty miraculous means that I ended up even knowing he existed.
I've also been trying to work through some of the depression I've been struggling with..doing more around the house, walking the dogs (or rather them walking me)..still a work in progress, but it's a start and that's a great thing.
Preparing for Jordan's departure on Wed. We leave for Williamstown tomorrow to spend the evening with him and then go to his departure ceremony on Wed. morning. Fortunately I see my new doctor the day after, so I'm hoping and praying that with his help and the help of my family and friends I'll be able to keep from back-sliding too much. Grief and stress play such a huge role in Bipolar Disorder..so I will need to be very aware!
Will check back in after Wed. Hope everyone stays healthy..mentally and physically!!
God Bless,
Shawn
I'm thrilled to let everyone know that I really like my new doctor and felt that all important "click" right away. It was as if it was meant to be...easy to talk to, but at the same time it really seemed like he truly cared and he gave me great feedback and we actually have a plan! I've never really participated in intense psychotherapy (talk therapy) before, and I'm looking forward to it...although it's also somewhat scary, I'm certain it won't be easy and I know I will have A LOT of work to do between appointments.
One of the most ironic things is that he is located at the Morgantown Pastoral Psychological Center..so, I really didn't know what his approach would be and I was quite hesitant and nervous. But, I put my faith in the Lord and wow, I was so amazed...with the doctor of course, but more importantly with how God provided him to me. It was through some pretty miraculous means that I ended up even knowing he existed.
I've also been trying to work through some of the depression I've been struggling with..doing more around the house, walking the dogs (or rather them walking me)..still a work in progress, but it's a start and that's a great thing.
Preparing for Jordan's departure on Wed. We leave for Williamstown tomorrow to spend the evening with him and then go to his departure ceremony on Wed. morning. Fortunately I see my new doctor the day after, so I'm hoping and praying that with his help and the help of my family and friends I'll be able to keep from back-sliding too much. Grief and stress play such a huge role in Bipolar Disorder..so I will need to be very aware!
Will check back in after Wed. Hope everyone stays healthy..mentally and physically!!
God Bless,
Shawn
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